Fry Hard

The correct answer is 248, not 42

According to a free-wheeling surfer dude, the Theory of Everything may lie in an elegant mandala discovered back in 1887:



Garrett Lisi hopes to successfully beat string theory to unifying gravity with electromagnetism, and the strong and weak nuclear forces. In between surfing and mountain climbing, he will set about calculating the masses of 30-odd particles which the E8 pattern (pictured above) says should exist. Can't wait for the Large Hadron Collider to go online, eh.

UPDATE: Here's a YouTube of it working:

Let's Hear It for Tuhoe

Ali Ikram shows the right stuff in a Week of It, karaoke style. It's burst-a-bladder brilliant.

Tasers are a cop's best friend

While the shocking snuff video of Canadian Mounites tasering a Polish immigrant to death is doing the rounds, Leeds police are in the gun over tasering a man in a coma back in 2005:

"Mr Gaubert said he was on his way to meet friends when he suffered a hypoglycaemic fit on the bus which left him slumped on his seat clutching his rucksack. Armed police were called to the bus depot in Headingley and when he failed to respond to their challenges he was shot with the Taser. He said as this was happening, another officer was pointing a real gun at his head. He was restrained and eventually came round in the police van."

How rhetorical is this?

Helen Clark has promised that government departments are not going to cheerlead for them next election. Why then was not only Madeleine Setchell's job with Ministry of the Environment canned, but her replacement was a Labour flunky?



Are all passive-aggressive personalities now terrorists? That would explain the attempt at introducing Anti-Social Behaviour Orders then. Oh, come on... you can't take those transcripts as a serious threat to public safety? Good on the DomPost printing them and all. But seriously, my old man had more guns than the entire Freedom Fighter army, including a semi-automatic .22 fitted with a nightsight. The bunnies never stood a chance.

If I had to pick a winner between wingnut Tame Iti and a squad of stormtrooper Xs, my money's on the Allblackwaters:



Wait! This just in! Police have arrested four Maori men attempting to harness the sun with a flax net. Maybe Tame Iti will prove to be an artist after all.

Now the crayon has dried on the Health Select Committee's report recommending a ban on BZP, how long before the big bangs are banned? And is there anything that the government HASN'T given to the Law Commission to work on? Will Helen Clark inserting the Sim card into the Law Commission deck make any difference to the Misuse of Drugs Act re-write, or will Geoff Palmer put his reputation first? And will Crown Law ever grow a backbone?

Tomorrow is the anticipated date for the J&E committee to report back on the Electoral Finance Bill. DPF reckons that that will provide a six day window to read the latest Rigging Yarn. I have half a mind to wag work and go to this:

Stop the Labour/NZ First/Greens Electoral Finance "Gagging Bill"

What you can do:

Protest March: Auckland this Saturday 17 November from the Auckland Town
Hall at 10.30am (assemble from 10am)

Protest: Wellington next Wednesday, 21 November, for a march on Parliament.

This is to invite you to stand up and be counted.

ACT member John Boscawen is organising marches in Auckland and Wellington
to protest the Labour led Government's attack on democracy.

The Electoral Finance Bill is designed to curb political activity.

Labour and NZ First with help from the Greens and United Future are about to
ram through a law to gag free speech.

This despite vociferous objection from the Human Rights Commission, the Law
Society, Grey Power and concerned citizens from every sector of New Zealand
society.

The plan is to give Labour freedom to say what it likes in election year and
gag everyone else.

Once the Gagging Bill goes through - possibly as soon as next week - it will
be against the law for me to send an email such as this.

That's why the Human Rights Commission talks about a "chilling" impact on
democracy.

That's why this is a Gagging Bill by any other name and must be stopped.

Join the marches

If you want to help contact John@boscawen.co.nz

Great Balls of Fire

Wellington's annual Guy Fawkes display was one of the reasons I came back to live here. It goes off, every year without fail. I saw this year's from my street and the scale was all wrong. The noises were off and the lack of awe amongst most of the neighbours was almost palpable. To really get the feel for it, you have to be down the harbour amongst the throngs of Frank Kitts or Waitangi Parks, before wandering off home in the fug of gunpowder that drifts down towards Newtown.

Ah, the sights! The smells! Takes me back to my first terrorist camp:



Five years old and playing with fire. The Soccer Mums would be furious. If you can't take a pram along to displays of large things that explode, well, they should all be banned, right? And this, on the second anniversary of Rod Donald's death. Rod was a strong believer in the right to have fun with gunpowder, yet the Greens say silent.

It's a very interesting yarn between Kathy Ryan and Police Commissioner Howard Broad, discussing "going to the supermarket." It sort of confirms the grapevine stuff, and raises more questions than it answers. What is clear from Howard Broad's circumlocutions is that the threshold of the Terrorist Suppression Act is too high.

It ain't easy being a cop.

As John Ip confirms in the rejoinder, Howard Broad's comments are very disconcerting comment. Howard Broad wanted to prosecute under a law that doesn't exist. The Terrorist Suppression Act has justifiably high thresholds. It was designed in the usual way of platitudinous mumbo-jumbo UN treaty nonsense, hurriedly and for show only. It's not a working model. To ensure that a threat to life, limb or utilities had to be absolutely imminent, two checks were put in place. Both the Attorney General and Solicitor General had to agree to the charges being laid. Michael Cullen abdicated his responsibilites and left the matter entirely in the hands of the Solicitor General, David Collins QC.

Lacking the name of the supermarket, how to get to the supermarket, and what they were going to buy. That's the threshold the cops couldn't reach, even after simultaneous dawn raids, checkpoints, and numerous breaches of innocent people's dignity, reputation and right not to have automatic weapons pointed at them by balaclavaed amoured cops. All those hundreds of pages of inadmissable evidence or illegal wiretapping, depending on how you look at it.

This "early intervention" guff is the stuff that confirms my wildest fears. This is Margaret-Shields-seeing-skulls-in-rum-advertisements crazy. The Police Commissioner would like to see the threshold lowered so he can pre-emptorarily, unilaterally surveil anybody playing silly buggers in the bush and spouting nonsense about taking over the world. Are they going to tap Helen Clark's mutterings on her next Norwegian Wood holiday?

Between the Idea
And the Reality
Falls the Shadow

There Is No Terror in New Zealand

This just in from Scoop... There will be no charges laid using the Terrorism Suppression Act 2002. Maybe this letter from a bunch of kiwis had something to do with it.

Latest Headlines from the "War on Violence"

While we wait for real details to emerge on the Tuhoe Terrorists, we are left with sheer speculation, rumour, gossip and innuendo to base our conclusions at present. On the whole, it's best to leave that cat in the box a bit longer. What the hell, way it looks so far... A few people did some very stupid things. The cops, pushed too soon once the hunters bumped into something, over-reacted.

There's every chance I'm completely wrong. Perhaps the cops will lay out some heinous plan with a veritable cornucopia of inflammatory, incriminatory evidence. Time will tell. What is clear from Peter Wiliams QC getting involved with the Ruatoki locals, is that the cops had better come up with a phenomenally good reason to do what they did up there. The police wouldn't dream of pulling that shit in Remuera. Would they hunt for a panther by roadblocking, photographing and searching the Parnell People? The ends had better justify the means.

Not that this is a big problem for Helen Clark at present. Failing to secure state funding for political campaigns through the EFB beta version hasn't prevented her from achieving the same thing through the Appropriation (Continuation of Interim Meaning of Funding for Parliamentary Purposes) Bill.

Nor is blaming Treasury as the reason for not having personal tax cuts until election year '08 beyond the pale. Cullen remaining as Finance Minister means that Labour intend to hit big. Cullen is already underselling the tax cuts. Under-promise, over-deliver. Expect to see the first $xxxx income made tax-free and rammed through just before the election. Doing so would cost only slightly more than the interest-free student loan thumbsucker, while bringing NZ into line with Oz's tax regime.

I felt a bit of sympathy for the poor buggers protesting outside the Labour Party conference. Sure, the wild-eyed frenzies were a bit full-on, but good on them trying some amateur dramatics for the cameras. I have organised peaceful political protests before, but the media just aren't interested. Peaceful gatherings where nothing happens just isn't good telly. Guantanamo wannabes and army fatigue guy was at least an attempt to tangify the protest in the televisual aesthetic. Whacking someone with a megaphone on camera is also good telly.

I'm looking forward to the fireworks display in the harbour in just over an hour. Regardless of how crap the day of November the 5th is in Wellington, it always clears up in time for the big bangs. Tonight's goona be a corker. It's not just the main display that grabs me every time, but also the entire city's backyards full of light and sound. Pity the tyrant is threatening to ban the whole gig if we don't behave. Pressure valves are there for a reason. Pity there's no way to tell which way the wind is blowing when you're in the House of Representatives.

Born in the NZ, eh

If one wished to sum up how the Labour government have treated single blue collar males, this is it (click on the image and wait a bit):

If one prefers more words, give this excellent episode of Eye to Eye a squizz. The next election will be won or lost, through act or omission, on this group. Piss us off at your peril.

Movember is coming...

The People's Front of Judea

This just in, bail has been revoked for New Zealand's terrorist mastermind, Vicious Dangerous Commando Guy:

"In an unusual move, the Crown lodged an appeal at the High Court in Auckland after the district court this morning granted Jamie Beattie Lockett, 46, of Takanini, in Manukau City, bail."

This whole business seems increasingly unusual. Smells rum, by gum. Molotov cocktails are a good, scary name for bottled petrol. Tell me more about this 'napalm bomb'. Entry-level napalm can be made from polystyrene and petrol. A beanbag on a bonfire is technically a napalm bomb. We're not talking Dr Evil scale terrorism here so far. What with the international attention that is causing untold harm to our country's reputation from all this, the police had better start coughing up some real evidence pronto.

On a completely different subject, here's the People's Front of Judea:

The Day After Tomorrow Will Be a Lovely Day For Sleeping Dogs

I have seen enough guns to last me a lifetime, several in fact. I sometimes wonder if going dawn shooting with the old man before primary school contributed to my deafness, or whether the guns in the house was the source of my life of anxiety. I have see what damage rifles can do. Guns are a coward's weapon. I fail to see the sport in shooting animals with them. There is not an animal alive that can outrun a bullet. Anyone who has to resort to a gun to win an argument doesn't have God or right on their side. All they have is a gun.

Jemima protects the babies from BZP

Jacqui "Ban Dihydrogen Mono-oxide" Dean is determined to go for a trifecta of fuck-ups over the BZP ban. Today, she's Jacqui "Won't someone think of the children" Dean. Toddlers have accidentally swallowed BZP. Therefore if BZP is banned, toddlers will no longer put dubious things into their mouths. Simply brilliant logic. Of course, none of the toddlers who ingested BZP pills died or anything. But they MIGHT have.

Boo Hoo

Cheese-eating Surrender Monkeys 20 - All Blacks 18. Get over it.

Graphic distortion

A few in the Blue spectrum are taking this graph from Rod Deane's site seriously:

While the figures are no doubt entirely correct in the literal sense, the context in which they are used is laughingly misleading.

Remember New Zealand in 1820? Neither do I. Thankfully, Harrison M Wright's "New Zealand 1769-1840: Early Years of Western Contact" is at hand. Pages 23 and 24 enlighten us as to the source of New Zealand's Gross Domestic Product in 1820:

"Kororareka was a Maori settlement in the Bay which was later to become the
source of much contention as the principal rendezvous of visiting whalers and
the whipping boy of missionaries and their supporters...

"Whalers that visited the Bay of Islands anchored at Kororareka, since it was
the most convenient spot, and the number of vessels which did so increased
markedly about 1820...

"The white population at Kororareka apparently fluctuated around one or two
dozen for several years."

The next OECD ranking appears 50 years later, in 1870. By sheer coincidence, 1870 is also when the Otago gold rush had hit its peak.

Next stop is 1913, a quantum leap of 43 years. Refrigerated shipping had been bringing home the bacon for New Zealand around thirty years. From Michael King's History of NZ (pg 279):

"[I]n 1911 the urban population of New Zealand exceeded the rural for the first time... The population of Auckland alone jumped from 51,000 in 1896 to 103,000 by 1911."

The GDP pump of farming provides much the same reason as the next time jump, 37 years later in 1950. The post-war economy is pumping due to NZ farmers being the Allied's market garden during WWII.

The next randomly chosen year is 1973, the year the UK joined the European Union and we lost our beef and lamb buying power. It is the beginning of the end.

27 years later, in 1990, New Zealand has just been restructured to death. SMPs are gone, as are a range of tariffs that hid the true cost of things. Our comparative worth with the rest of the world is back to where it was when we once were whalers.

Apart from that, I pretty much agree with what Dr Deane was on about.

Three STV's and an FPP

Early indications show that if anybody is the winner in this year's local body elections, it's the Apathy Party by a landslide. Mike Moreu nicely sums up the dilemma confronting voters. My voting forms arrived some few weeks ago, as well as a 43-page booklet crammed with candidate profiles of no more than 150 words each. I finally posted it a coupla days ago. As DPF has posted up his preferences, here's who I chose and why:

Mayor

Nick Kelly (complete tosser) - 11
Helene Ritchie (loon) - 10
Bryan Pepperell (undeserved egotist) - 9
Carl Gifford (who?) - 8
John McGrath (twat) - 7
Jack Ruben (loon) - 6
Paul Bailey (who?) - 5
Rob Goulden (reminds me of Jason Hoyte in Gormsby and Outrageous Fortune) - 4
Nick Wang (he's got balls) - 3
Kerry Prendergast (married to Rex) - 2
Ray Ahipene-Mercer (competent) - 1

Western Ward

Fuck all choice here. Maybe I should have had a go after all.

Jack Ruben (loon) -5
Pauline Scott (generic Labour) - 4
John Morrison (poseur) - 3
Jo Coughlan (wild card) - 2
Andy Foster (sane) - 1

Capital and Coast District Health Board

This is the real spanner in the works. Note the numbering below. Even with a BA in politics, I screw up the vote. Utterly pointless exercise. Best tool here is a Dungeons and Dragons dice.

Helene Ritchie (loon) - 21
Coltyn Shaw (OK, you're Maori. Now what?) - 20
Jim Delahunty (no photo) - 19
Trisha Inglis (Kapiti) - 19
Karen Coutts (Labour ticket) - 18
John Cook (Waikanae not Wellington) - 17
Kent Clark (hippy) - 16
Adrian Webster (used the term 'social justice') - 15
Gordon Strachan (Kapiti) - 13
Hayley Wain (I hate Hayley Westernra) - 12
David Chamberlain (can balance a cheque book) - 11
Virginia Hope (Aucklander) - 10
Petra van den Munckhof (cool name) - 9
Felicity McLennan (nurse) - 8
Michael Appleby (I had to) - 7
Judith Aitken (incumbent) - 6
Sandra Patton (seemed clued up) - 5
Peter Roberts (doctor) - 4
Margaret Faulkner (nurse) - 3
Ruth Gottlieb (she's a yoda) - 2
Donald Urquhart-Hay (so dedicated, he worked in Palmy for 5 years) - 1

Wellington Regional Council

Woohoo! Onto the final leg here. No numbers, just five ticks. I hope there's a chocolate fish in it for me after all this work.

Judith Aitken (incumbent)
Bernard Darnton (token Libz vote)
Michael Gibson (it seemed a good idea at the time)
John Gilberthorpe (smart and networked like Neo)
Fran Wilde (the Cake Tin)