Cannabis and Conservative Exceptionalism

Silly season continues in NZ, where all the jaded journos are on holiday and the MSM mastheads are manned by toddler news hounds. Little wonder that the headlines are full of uncritical reprints of police press releases. If I had a budget of $1.6 billion a year, I'd be spamming the press with happy clappy goon tunes too.

Meanwhile, in Colorado, recreational cannabis has been legalised. Local authorities report no signs of apocalypse, but it's still early days. The federal government has yet to stick its oar in.

Conservative exceptionalism is alive elsewhere, as always. The Vanilla Prince of the New York Times, David Brooks, penned a column where he distilled the white privilege down to its raw ingredients:

[M]ost of us developed higher pleasures.

Therein lies the snobbery. Sure, some may move on to other pursuits; private golf clubs, charity gigs and other pissing competitions between trust fund babies, for example. Whatever floats your boat.

But not everyone desires such aristocratic inanities. Brooks not only pulls the ladder up behind him, but then tries to beat everyone else below his lofty perch with it. Good on Brooks' old stoner buddy calling his bullshit.

NZ has its own parrots of privelege here as well. Rosemary Macleod is a reliable squawker, with her monotonous cry of "Tried it, didn't like it, don't make it legal."

A few politicians have admitted historical usage (eg. Goff, Dunne, Groser), giving them similar sanctimony to continue this civil war on drugs.

It just goes to show that wealth, power and privilege can be more harmful and addictive than any plant from the wrong side of the Magnolia family tree.

UPDATE: This just in from Matt Taibbi.

Aaron Gilmore is unwell

Aaron Gilmore, raconteur and bon vivant, has burst back into the Court of St. James in style.

Looking back as a burnt-out hospo droid, I had to put up with a lot of shit in my time. Oh, the stories I could tell, but my lips are zipped. What goes on in hospo stays in hospo.

However, these are not the old days. Waitrons and bar managers can get hefty fines (for a waitron, if not a National Party tit sucker) or lose their licence for serving drunk arseholes.

But what really grinds my gears is that these Bachanalian bastard lawmakers refuse to stop arresting and jailing less surly behaviour from the cannabis hippies.

And call me a dope fiend, but aren't all these Nats beginning to look the same whiter shade of pale?

Double entry

Should journalists moonlight as prostitutes? ponders this TVNZ story. At least one TVNZ worker says yes.

Live Anger Management Display

It's not often a cannabis law reformer gets to gloat, so hats off to Skinny and Serenity for making my Monday with this Live Anger Management Display at a Drug Rehab / Mobile Phone Co Sponsored Skate Event:


Today At Vic Park from NZskate.com on Vimeo.

Talk about killing two birds with one stone. Corporate sponsorship of "community events" and sleb born again messiahs becoming pariahs in an instant. Sweet.

The Brown Shirted bloke hanging out the clothesline above is artist and skater judge Craig Platt, who has since apologised for being a dick. Accusations over the handing out of spray cans and incitement to spray their logos about has been denied, although the evidence is pretty compelling:

The Real Steve Gray has also helpfully included the promo poster for the event:

Skinny is Telecom's latest cunning disguise into the youth market for cellphones. Phone pushers if you will.

Serenity Drug, Alcohol & Addiction Rehab is run by former drug lover William Murdoch. The verbiage on the Serenity site reads much like another self-proclaimed neon messiah selling salvation I know, my brother. My advice is to give neither of them your money or your time.

More creepy though is this little gem on Facebook:

That's right, win rehab at an under 16s youth event! First it was state funded Scientology drug education, now it's Mr Angry selling rehab at a kid's park. And they call drug users self-destructive. Ha!

Labour reveals another cleavage

The Labour Party locked out the press (and by extension, the public) at their election year congress recently. Is this the same Labour Party who held the Open Labour forum last year?

That's our Hone!

Maori Party MP Hone Harawira calls the expected rise in GST an attack on the poor. Of course, Hone and friends had no worries increasing tobacco tax on the very same bloc not so many weeks ago. The excise tax increase on a 50 gram pouch of tobacco was more than the anticipated extra GST on over $400 of goods and services.

The rich can get duty free tobacco on their way back from Paris or Brussels, or claim back GST under their company dodge. The poor pay above and beyond the full retail price. Methinks the brown clown speaks with forked tongue.

Rosemary Intolerance

I think I might be allergic to Rosemary McLeod. I can handle her prose in limited doses normally, her quaint fuddy-duddy viewpoints nicely yinning to Garth George's yang in Old Person Symmetry. But what really gets me rash is when McLeod gets on her high horse backwards and tells other people how to live.

Reformed boozer Garth George can at least tolerate the continued existence of alcohol to the general public, but Rosemary is much more contrary. Yeah, she's tried cannabis. Didn't like it. Should be banned. Cigarettes? Yeah, she tried them. Didn't like them. Should be banned.

I am sure that many of Rosemary's pastimes would bore me into suicide. But as those recreational pursuits don't impact on my life, each to their own. Here's a reposted return fire from me in the comments section:

There are few furies more passionate and monomaniacal than the ex-smoker on smoking. I've been smoking over twenty years and I'm not dead yet. I continue to enjoy the habit, and it's not just the nicotine saying that.

In that time, the government has skimmed great wads of cash off me to the point where I must have paid off at least three iron lungs or perhaps an MRI scanner by now. The Health service has never been strained with my suffering the colourful conditions that feature graphically on every legal product.

The most likely scenario of death is not featured on the warnings anyway; Hypothermia induced by smoking outdoors as mandated by law. One can go to the toilet indoors, but passive smoking is obviously much more dangerous than staph or cholera.

As far as vices go, smoking is less damaging to the public good than compulsive gambling or excessive drinking. My father outlived yours by five years; liver cancer complicated by cirrhosis, and it wasn't caused by smoking. Each to their own.

It was a vicious response, s'true. I might have to lay off the Rosemary for a bit. I'm taking a break from Michael Laws and Garth George as well. I think I've used up a enough of my lifetime wiping their spit flecks off my brain pan.

As an epilogue to that episode, here's James K Baxter's Lament for Barney Flanagan. HT Prayers for Recovering Alcoholics:

LICENSEE OF THE HESPERUS HOTEL
Flanagan got up on a Saturday morning,
Pulled on his pants while the coffee was warming;
He didn't remember the doctor's warning,
"Your heart's too big, Mr. Flanagan.

Barney Flanagan, sprung like a frog
From a wet root in an Irish bog -
May his soul escape from the tooth of the dog!
God have mercy on Flanagan.

Barney Flanagan R.I.P.
Rode to his grave on Hennessy's
Like a bottle-cork boat in the Irish Sea.
The bell-boy rings for Flanagan.

Barney Flanagan, ripe for a coffin,
Eighteen stone and brandy-rotten,
Patted the housemaid's velvet bottom -
"Oh, is it you, Mr. Flanagan?"

The sky was bright as a new milk token.
Bill the Bookie and Shellshock Hogan
Waited outside for the pub to open -
"Good day, Mr. Flanagan."

At noon he was drinking in the lounge bar corner
With a sergeant of police and a racehorse owner
When the Angel of Death looked over his shoulder -
"Could you spare a moment, Flanagan?"

Oh the deck was cut; the bets were laid;
But the very last card that Barney played
Was the Deadman's Trump, the bullet of Spades -
"Would you like more air, Mr. Flanagan?"

The priest came running but the priest came late
For Barney was banging at the Pearly Gate.
St Peter said, "Quiet! You'll have to wait
For a hundred masses, Flanagan."

The regular boys and the loud accountants
Left their nips and their seven-ounces
As chickens fly when the buzzard pounces -
"Have you heard about old Flanagan?"

Cold in the parlour Flanagan lay
Like a bride at the end of her marriage day.
The Waterside Workers' Band will play
A brass goodbye to Flanagan.

While publicans drink their profits still.
While lawyers flock to be in at the kill,
While Aussie barmen milk the till
We will remember Flanagan.

For Barney had a send-off and no mistake.
He died like a man for his country's sake;
And the Governor-General came to his wake.
Drink again to Flanagan!

Despise not, O Lord, the work of Thine own hands
And let light perpetual shine upon him.

Special K mimics the Goodnight Kiwi Experience

It's been known for some years that human bodies are loaded with dangerous drugs. We've known for yonks that our internal systems are filled with a dizzying array of opioid receptors. In the early Nineties, marijuana clone anandamide was discovered riddling our bodies. It's also a chemical found in chocolate.

According to Slashdot, scientists have now concluded that those religious moments during Near Death Experiences are caused by a physiological response which acts a bit like ketamine:

Surveys of NDE accounts show great similarities in the details, describing: a tunnel, a light, a gate or a door, a sense of being out of the body, meeting people they know or have heard about, finding themselves in the presence of God, and then returning, changed. Scientists have theorized that NDEs occur as a kind of physiological self-defense mechanism when, in order to guard against damage during trauma, the brain releases protective chemicals that also happen to trigger intense hallucinations. This theory has gained traction after scientists realized that virtually all the features of an NDE can be reproduced with a stiff dose of ketamine, a short-acting, hallucinogenic, dissociative anaesthetic.

Ketamine is also known a horse tanq, which begs the question; What do horses see during their Near Death Experiences? Next up, scientists will uncover the secret behind St Paul writing the Book of Revelations; a large plate of psychedelic mushrooms.

Drugs on Tuesday

The Expert Advisory Committee on Drugs, the governmental body tasked with evaluating the actual, demonstrable harms of various drugs on evidence-based criteria, has concluded a review of LSD:

Official documents show the committee felt LSD was inappropriately classified, based on evidence of risk of harm.

Peter Dunne, Associate Minister of Health has announced that under no circumstances will the classification of LSD be lowered. Dim Post rubs it in.

One voice who won't be offering any opinion on the matter is BK Drinkwater, who has recently scored a job with the Ministry of Health. He sets out the new rules of engagement here, following the sterilised muted blog examples of Roar Prawn, Che Tibby and Well Urban. In NZ, we don't lock up our dissidents. We give them jobs in the machine.

Law Commission on Drugs Part 5 soon.

Hell is other Kiwis

Every now and then, there's a glimpse of self-centred NIMByism behind the facade of the easygoing Kiwi myth. Yesterday, there was the NZ Bus refusal to advertise the Atheist Bus campaign. The spokesperson for Atheist Bus NZ was on bFM today explaining that many other Western countries ran the campaign without incident. It's just our allegedly compassionate Christianist godbotherers in NZ who wish to stifle this innocuous debate.

Then there's the Wet House planned for Island Bay (maximum occupancy 10 people) that has been canned. That harm reduction idea was killed with the help of reactionary crap like this site:

Children were at risk! One wet house resident in the UK killed three people! Watch the documentary of an obviously unwell man who might present some kind of threat!

The very latest round of NIMBYism has turned up in Hastings. While the Springhill Addiction Centre is undergoing refurbishment, an old rest home was going to be used as a temporary site for 20 people in recovery. This was too much for the NIMBYs of Mahora, who applied to the Environment Court (!) for a stay of proceedings. The Hawkes Bay DHB has given up, as Springhill would be opened before the court hearing had concluded.

It seems we only want to help those in need as long as our property prices remain unaffected.

John Key on drugs

Click image to embiggerate

It's OK, I'm a cop

Click to embiggerate

Operation Blue Cunt might have successfully stifled any inappropriate fun for the public. However, the police's New Year's celebrations are another story entirely:

One of the men is alleged to have approached a woman in a parked car and demanded her name and address. When she refused, he allegedly told her he was a police officer and pressed his badge against the windscreen. The woman - whose 11-year-son was in the back of the car - again refused to give the pair her details and told one of the officers that his fly was down. The Herald understands one of the officers is alleged to have then exposed himself to the woman and her son.

Unlike the "Whangamata chaos", which the police has no problem sexing up for the media, the blue hierarchy are staying tight-lipped on this matter:

Police will not confirm the exact nature or circumstances of the incident.

Luckily, the public don't have to rely on police sources for the truth, eh. No Right Turn and Tumeke say their pieces. I don't agree with Tumeke's point that this behaviour is best left to police bars, where this sort of abuse of power is tolerated out of sight and out of mind. It's just that sort of us and them mentality that lets control freaks with booze and badges think they're above the law.

Paul Holmes backs evidence based drug policy

MPs have tabled a motion in parliament calling for the government to adopt an evidence based approach to drugs policy. One of the co-signers is a Mr Paul Holmes.

The bad news is, it is not NZ's own stunt dwarf Paul Holmes, but Paul Holmes MP and others in the UK legislature:

MPs from the Cross-Party Group on Drugs and Alcohol Treatment and Harm Reduction (DATHR) have today tabled an Early Day Motion (EDM) calling on the Government to base its drugs and alcohol policy on scientific evidence. The call comes in the wake of the forced resignation of Professor David Nutt as Chair of the Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs (ACMD).

Nope, the NZ namesake still sits in Hypocrite Class with all those MPs who have used illegal recreational substances yet continue their flight of fancy at the public expense.

The Wedding Planners

When Rodney Hide and Hone Harawira leave parliament, they will probably become wedding planners. Rodney Hide is experienced at pulling out all the stops to make the perfect wedding and Hone Harawira can wax lyrical about Paris for potential honeymooners. The best part about this on-the-job training perk is that you get to root all the taxpayers.

Sugar pusher dumps Phelps for non-sugar hit

Multinational sugar dealers Kelloggs will not be renewing Olympic super fish Michael Phelps' sponsorship contract, due to the recent incident with a bong:

Kelloggs said it would not be renewing its sponsorship contract with Phelps, telling the Associated Press that Phelps' behaviour - he was caught on camera smoking marijuana - was "not consistent with the image of Kellogg(s).''

Please note that Kellogg's makes its fortune selling sugar to children. Popular brands include Cocoa Pops (now only 36.5 percent sugar!), Froot Loops (41.5 percent) and Frosties (41.3).

While it might be an attempt by Kellogg to minimise any collateral in the Soccer Mum market, to the rest of us it just looks like drug snobbery. Kellogg should have sucked it up, contexualised it. Reason magazine notes what Michael Phelps should have said when the moneymen told him to apologise:

You’ll have to pardon my cynicism. But I call bullshit. You don’t give a damn about my health. You just get a voyeuristic thrill from watching an elite athlete fall from grace–all the better if you get to exercise a little moral righteousness in the process...

Tell you what. I’ll make you a deal. I’ll apologize for smoking pot when every politician who ever did drugs and then voted to uphold or strengthen the drug laws marches his ass off to the nearest federal prison to serve out the sentence he wants to impose on everyone else for committing the same crimes he committed. I’ll apologize when the sons, daughters, and nephews of powerful politicians who get caught possessing or dealing drugs in the frat house or prep school get the same treatment as the no-name, probably black kid caught on the corner or the front stoop doing the same thing.

I'd like to see all the board members, directors and management of Kellogg stand with hand on heart and swear that they've never taken stronger drugs than high frustose corn syrup. Let's face it, if you win as many gold medals as Michael Phelps did last year, you've earned a little bit of slack. It's not as if he ran a $50 billion Ponzi scheme or bankrupted Lehman Brothers or anything. This is a man who looks after himself. As professionals have noted, that was quite some bong. The King of Bongs, in fact:

According to connoisseurs, the ROOR is designed for—ahem—high performance. As opposed to being made like a hippified art object, it's constructed from the glass you'd find in chemistry beakers, which makes it easy to clean. (Bongs, apparently, get quite sticky with tar.) It also has a series of clever seals: Tight rubber O-rings that prevent leaks and allow the smoke density to be regulated more easily.

If Phelps had been drinking whisky and not smoke out of a glass, there would be no story. In fact, he probably would have got another sponsor. But because instead he was imbibing unsponsorable marijuana smoke, he is villified.

I'm just hoping this bites Kellogg on the bum with stoners boycotting their products. That could do some serious damage to their market share. From now on, I'm getting my sugar from Sanitarium and Chelsea!

Doctors able to prescribe handgun on prescription

If the assault rifle with the chainsaw bayonet wasn't too out there for you, how about a new determination by the US Food and Drug Administration that classifies a gun as a medical device, available on prescription?

We thought you might be interested to learn that the FDA has completed its “Device/Not a Device” determination and concluded the handgun will be listed as a Class I Medical Device, exempt from 510(k) Pre-Market Notification in accordance with 21 CFR 890.5050 “Daily Activity Assist Device.”

We have now submitted an application to the CMS contractor Noridian for a DME (Durable Medical Equipment) Coding Verification in order to be assigned an HCPCS code. Once assigned , physicians will be able to prescribe the Palm Pistol for qualified patients who may seek reimbursement through Medicare or private health insurance companies.

Hat Tip /.

The High Cost of Living

While Tony Veitch roams free, two students at a NORML stall in Dunedin were arrested yesterday (vid here) on charges of resisting arrest, possessing cannabis, possessing utensils for smoking cannabis and obstruction.

Senior Sergeant Mel Aitken said police acted on information from officers at the scene that Gray was smoking marijuana at a Norml stall at a market day on the university's union lawn. Police also received a complaint from the university proctor's office.

Tell me, people, who are YOU more worried about? A coward of the country or a couple of poor Dunedin hippies?

Do Not Feed the Animals

There's a veritable media frenzy in the MSM and blogosphere about the new rules to cover how the press cover the Parliamentary zoo. The MSM have declared war with the DomPost showing Tariana Turia with a headache next to Heather Roy. The Herald has a photo gallery dedicated to politician self-ridicule.

Although the new rules loosen the press gallery's leash in some respects, the contempt of parliament charge for depicting MPs in "satire, ridicule or denigration" was a step way over the line. It is a well known constitutional convention that we reserve the right to take the piss. I thought the Speaker had nodded to this ideal by pushing for MPs to be more accountable to the Official Information Act. It was fun while it lasted. Jeremy Wells could be jailed for doing what he does under the new rules.

Colin Espiner's new blog had a go at the story last night. I posted a comment about the Jeremy Wells factor, then refreshed the page to check whether comments were posted automatically or held for approval a la Cactus. It was there. Now it's not. In fact, it disappeared within an hour of posting it last night. And there you have it. Truth is a three-edged sword.

Long before Parliament upped the heavies and installed X-Ray machines, Press House in Boulcott St has been locked up like a nunnery. Unlike Question Time at Parliament, you couldn't just walk in off the street into the typing pool. TVNZ is likewise securitised. Try to satirise, ridicule or denigrate an MSM and they will sic lawyers on you. Don't mistake this for a David and Goliath story. This is fight between Goliaths for the monopoly on truth.

Oh Far Cough

Jeezy-wheezy, isn't Rosemary Mcleod in a huff over the cannabis puff?

"Just half a joint of cannabis can trigger symptoms similar to schizophrenia in anyone, British psychiatrists warned last week."

And giving peanuts to anyone might trigger symptoms of death. When are you going to ban the peanuts? And if half a joint can send us all psycho, why isn't that reflected in NZ's mental stats? That's because you are wrong, dear Rosemary.

"As people my age know, cannabis is much stronger today than it was in ours."

That's because you are old and we are young. We can handle the jandal, while the more delicate can stick to St John's Wort. We don't have to smoke huge reefers to get us where we want to go. A spot here, a toke there. Less is better, and NZ grows more varieties of cannabis than there are wineries.

"Is violence the only real danger they face in family life? What if both parents were exercising a legal right to be stoned every day of the week?"

Oh no, won't somebody think of the children?? I know many responsible parents who sit down for a smoke once the young ones are tucked away, in much the same as many others might pour a G&T. The big difference is, smoke too much dope and you fall asleep. Drink too much off the top shelf and you might take a swing at the kids. I've seen many more moody and mean drunks than angry hippies.

But Rosemary Mcleod cannot be that ignorant or hypocritical. I think she's afraid of the Gnarly Marley for other reasons. Just as her generation never trusted anyone over 40, now she's hit that bump, she trusts no-one under 40. We can't handle the reality, she reckons.

It's been a busy few weeks, getting a few things done for J Day. I was interviewed for a Salient story on the cannabis movement at Fidel's on Friday night. Saturday was J Day in Central Park, featuring Met Turei speaking about her Medpot Bill, as well as some bands and DJs: 5:16, Narcosia, Tough Love, Xhale, Espionage and Psychedelic Jellyfish.

What an interesting bunch of people. I caught up with a medpot user who was once defended by the old man in court. Three Mongrel Mob members had picked a fight on him and lost. These three big fellas sat in the front row of court, while the skinny short defendant sat in the dock. The old man had the judge in tears of laughter, dismissed all charges. This dude has got me interested in picking up Aikido.

There was the Brit who lives in the town where the CCTVs tell you off. He's seriously considering emigrating here for good. Caught up with a Palmy family who presented a filled-in medpot petition from the NORML News she had passed around. Due to a small clusterfuck of venue change (our bad), they had gone to the wrong festival and lit up a fat one. No-one seemed to mind. The whanau finally made it up the hill to the real venue. The missus she was in retrospective horror for the rest of the afternoon. No harm done, and what a story to tell when she got home!

Who dares presume to know better than these people in pain? A wise man once told me, "the absence of pain can, in itself, be a form of pleasure." So stick your moral panic where it hurts, Ms Mcleod.