A quick glance at the calendar shows it is only fifteen sleeps until the Safety Nazis arrive. That's right, the anti-smoking laws banning smoking indoors in every workplace come into effect on 10th December. Whether you work alone or own the business, whether you're on a charter boat off Waiheke Island or sitting in a strip club surrounded by naked women, Health Department Enforcement Officers can inspect the premises to ensure no-one sucks a fag indoors. Obstructing one of these officers can land you with a $1000 fine, so don't get in the way of their Final Tobacco Solution.
In two short weeks, returned servicemen who risked their lives fighting for our freedom will be told to take their filthy habit outside. Having survived the horrors of war, few will enjoy the irony of their country pushing them outside to catch pneumonia and die.
To commemorate this historic day, the goNZo Freakpower Brains Trust brings you the Official Tobacco Persecution Armband:
As the pictures show, the 100% natural cotton armband suits both casual and formal fashion and looks smart alongside any military decorations. The armband is Kiwi made from local and/or imported ingredients (just like Watties Spaghetti!) and available for the low price of $2 (incl. p&p).
Please send $2 for each armband and your postal address to:
Tobacco Persecution Armband
goNZo Freakpower Brains Trust
PO Box 27-102